Relationship Dilemmas:Divorce, Love, & Finances
The
autumn season can present moments of relationship dilemmas. It is a season that
constantly makes you rethink, evaluate, and rediscover your partner. Although
the autumn season is a time of transformation, sadness, loneliness, and other
changes that might happen during a relationship; Divorce is a subject that
begins in some relationships. Additionally filing divorce in the autumn season
can occur due to finances, unfaithfulness, and unresolved issues in
communication. Also, love and the subject of finances is spoken on a daily or
weekly basis with your partner.
Before you begin discussing
the subject of divorce with your partner, make sure that is what you want for
both of you. Often filing divorce for the reason of finances might not be a
good decision. First think about why you want a divorce. This can be due to
miscommunication. Ask yourself these questions that are listed below.
- Can you fix your finances through a financial advisor?
- Do you need to have a joint bank account with your partner?
- Do you need separate bank accounts?
- Are you overspending due to stressful situations?
- Are you being compulsive with your shopping and blaming your partner for all the financial problems?
- Do you or your partner have hidden bank accounts, credit cards, or savings account?
- Does your partner owe money to his previous wife or ex's?
- Do you need a vacation, or an emergency fund separate from your partner?
- Do you want to divorce your partner because of finances?
- Do you think a therapist can help both of you with your financial problems?
- Do I love my partner no matter how bad the financial problems are?
After
answering these questions, allow some time to rethink and analyze your
financial issues. Create a weekly or a monthly budget plan with your partner.
Decide if you need a joint account or a separate bank account. For some couples,
a joint account might be enough to fix financial problems. While others might
prefer separate accounts and separate savings accounts.
If you cannot
decide, ask a financial advisor or a therapist to help you see different
perspectives about budgeting finances as a couple. It is estimated that forty
percent of couples get a divorce due to disagreements in finances, arguing too
much, and a high debt that is impossible to pay back. Unfortunately, there are
times when divorce is the last and only option for leaving a relationship.
Incompatibilities in managing money, bad attitudes, and not communicating
enough make it difficult to compromise with a financial budget. Therefore,
before you file for divorce, think about each other's goals, dreams, and
desires of how to save money and what both of you need.
Ask for some
space from your partner to think about making your relationship work. As well
as finding ways to develop better communication. Understand your partner
emotionally and continue asking yourself questions. Additionally ask tough
questions to your partner in a calm manner. Reconsider not to divorce
especially if a financial advisor and a therapist can help both of you to have
a successful financial budget.
However financial
strain can make it harder to have a healthier relationship with your partner.
If your partner was unfaithful and spent too much money on the other person;
Then you might want to think about divorce and have a discussion with them. Moreover,
if your partner spent too much money for a porn addiction or other addictions;
Seek a professional therapist before getting a divorce. Keep in mind that it
can be emotional distress, too much job pressure, or other reasons for spending
too much money. Do not shout at your partner or complain too much about overspending,
especially if you know they have an addiction.
Nonetheless,
physically abused, controlling money, greed, and differences in managing money
are important reasons for getting a divorce. Do not stay in the relationship
especially if it is because of money reasons and your partner hurts you
physically. Get a separate bank account and if needed memorize your bank
account numbers. Have someone you trust to keep your bank information ahead of time,
so your domestic violent partner does not find out about it. Immediately get
out of the harmful relationship and do not disclose details about hiding your
money from them.
Last, differences
in finances can last for months or years before finalizing a divorce. Depending
on state laws, a divorce can take six to fifteen months. It is necessary to be
honest, communicate money decisions, and find a balance in saving money for a
budget plan. Finances are relationship dilemmas that need to be discussed every
month. Do not feel guilty for getting a divorce because of finances.
Remember that
there are many reasons for getting a divorce and financial issues are one
reason for getting a divorce. Some committed relationships can be saved with
better communication, understanding, and consideration for your partner. Other
relationships are tough, but overtime money issues have become an item from the
past. Furthermore, seeking professional counseling, therapy, and a financial
advisor can help both of you have less miscommunication regarding money. Here
are websites about saving your marriage and budgeting as a couple.
21 Valid Tips on How to Save Your Marriage from Divorce:
21 Valid Tips on How to Save Your Marriage from Divorce
How to Budget as a Couple-BECU:
How to Budget as a Couple-BECU
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